“What the Hell are you chewing?”
I say this phrase almost every day when I hear an unfamiliar crunch coming from the back seat. Mac has added a lot to our journey through 7 weeks. He’s brought us love, frustration, happiness, blood boiling anger, and lots of laughter. When I told people that I would be traveling with a dog for 10 weeks across the country, I usually received an eyebrow raise and a look that says, “You’re f#*$ing crazy”. The truth is, Mac has brought us through the entire spectrum of emotions, but I can’t help but think that, given the chance to do it over, I’d bring him along again.
Here are the pros and cons to traveling with Mac.
Pros
1. He takes the pressure off
Everyone knows that houseguests can get annoying after a few days. You feel pressure to entertain them, they overtake your living room, eat your food, and occupy the bathroom. Mac’s primary job is to take the focus off of us (needy houseguest) by stealing the heart of the host. We’ve had nearly 20 different hosts thus far, and most of them are so preoccupied with Mac’s puppy cuteness, that they actually seem sad to see us go (or at least do a great job acting like it). Most of the female hosts have not-so-jokingly asked Mac (in a squeaky high-pitched dog-talk voice) if he’d like to stay with them instead of leaving with us.
As a reward for his duty, I turn a blind eye when someone inevitably feeds him the food under the table or lets him lick the plates clean after dinner.
2. He does some hilarious sh*t
Mac emits a high-pitched squealing when he sees (or smells) cows, horses, or other livestock. He flipped out when we drove next to a bison in Yosemite, and lost his mind trying to jump out the window after a giant elk at the Grand Canyon (The elk was over a 10 point and would have messed his day up). After we leave the room for 10 minutes or 10 hours, Mac must greet us with the same happiness, usually accompanied by an “Offering”. The offering is an outward gesture to show his pleasure with our return home. Anything he can find will suffice as an offering. Most of the time it’s a chew toy. If a chew toy is not available, a sock, a water bottle, or trash are sufficient offerings in his mind. I got a Safeway receipt offering after picking him up at the Kennel in the Grand Canyon. The best part about receiving an offering is the “Darth Vader Voice”. This is the deep, heavy, throat breathing that accompanies most offerings. I’m not positive if the Vader voice comes from excitement or a struggle to breath while holding the offering in his teeth.
3. His happiness makes me happy
When I can let him off the leash in some remote place with no one around, it’s an incredible feeling. Watching him run at top speed while doing figure 8s in the sand, following me as we climb boulders in the desert, or chasing waves on the beach, I can tell that he’s in his own little doggy heaven, and that makes me happy.
Cons
1. Dog Friendliness
Many of the destinations on our journey have not been dog friendly. Almost all of the National Parks, frustratingly, do not allow dogs on trails. Mac is a hiking dog with buckets of energy. It sucks to leave him in the car or hotel while we hike and explore the National Parks, especially when I know that he can handle most of the trails.
Hotels and Airbnbs often require pet fees or pet deposits. Marriott’s fee is $75 per stay, which is ridiculous, and the reason we snuck him in through the back door during our latest Marriott stay.
2. Dog Hair
It’s all over our clothes, the car, the bags, and I’ve found some in our food. It’s never ending.
3. He requires a TON of exercise
It doesn’t matter if I’m tired, hung over, sick, or don’t feel like it. Mac needs to run. Everyday. Or else it’s like living with the Tasmanian Devil.
4. He Hates Cats
This isn’t a shocker, but we’ve had a few run-ins with host’s cats that resulted in, what sounded like, a Tom and Jerry Cartoon. Screeching, barking, and paws sliding on hardwood. Not an ideal situation. Thankfully nothing expensive has been broken to date. This happened in Rhode Island, Montana, and Seattle. And once Mac knows about a cat in the vicinity, he won’t sleep until he finds it, which means we won’t be sleeping much either.
5. Territory Marking
We haven’t had too much of a problem with Mac peeing in all the new environments that he’s been thrust into, until we got to Vegas. Mac peed in Dave’s apartment in Las Vegas 5 times in 2 days. Dave also has a young male dog, and Mac (who is afraid of his own shadow) decided to assert his dominance in this situation by peeing all over the other dog’s domain. The culmination of these urinary events nearly ruined a chair cushion and a throw pillow.
Despite the fact that I have only listed 3 pros versus 5 cons, Mac has added more to our journey than he has taken away. As every dog owner knows, your dog always seems to find a way to do something that makes you want to scream and curse his name. This feeling gets amplified on the road, with the close quarters, strange places, and lack of routine. But so many great stories would be missing if Mac had stayed at home, and he definitely keeps things interesting.
Plus, how many dogs get to see the world?
